Tonight I had an “Ooooh, I get it now!” moment.
I was having one of those days where I was pondering my existence and thoughts like “I think I exist, that I’m something, but this is my ego talking, so I have to get rid of my ego” were floating around my head.
I was listening to Alan Watts (I think I have some kind of obsession with him) and he said the most simple and obvious sentence that I’ve heard many times before, except this time instead of understanding the meaning based on intellect, I understood it based on an internal awareness.
Alan Watts was talking about the ego and he said that you “can’t get rid of it because it doesn’t exist. It’s an illusion…You can’t do anything about it because you don’t exist.”
Straight away something clicked in my brain.
It seems so simple now!
I don’t need to worry about trying to get rid of my ego because it doesn’t really exist. I just perceive that it exists because that’s the nature of the human mind at this time.
I’m so busy concentrating on overcoming my ego that I failed to realise that I was indulging another ego-trip – but a trip that didn’t really exist. An illusory trip. A very good trip, but a non-existent one nonetheless.
So why should I bother trying to waste my time and energy on overcoming something that doesn’t exist?
If it’s not there then what am I doing? I have no idea.
I guess if this is all an illusion and I’m nothing then I can just float along and enjoy the ride.
It’s a peaceful feeling.
It’s a strange feeling sitting in the silence of your mind and the world and knowing neither exists.
It makes me feel quiet and thoughtful, but also thoughtless.
“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” ~ Shaskespeare
Be happy. Be you.